Ep. 61: The Hero’s Journey: Jilyne Jarvis on Transformation, Dancing with Fear, and Empowering the Next Generation
There’s a saying I come back to often in my coaching work: Excellence leaves clues. Sometimes those clues come from elite athletes or CEOs. Sometimes they show up in unexpected places, a middle school gym, a nonprofit fundraiser, or in the story of someone who refused to give up when the easier path would’ve been to walk away.
That’s exactly what I found in my conversation with Jilyne Jarvis, co-founder and executive director of ZGiRLS, a nonprofit that’s been building confidence in middle school girls for over a decade.
Jilyne’s story is one of grit, self-discovery, and a commitment to making a real difference. From ski racing to leading a nonprofit that now partners with some of the world’s best athletes, her journey holds powerful lessons for anyone looking to grow, whether you’re an athlete, an entrepreneur, or simply someone who’s ready to take that next step in your own life.
In this blog, I’ll walk through Jilyne’s journey, highlight some of the themes we explored on the podcast, and share three actionable steps you can take right now to push past self-doubt and move closer to the impact you want to make.
From Ski Racing to Confidence Building
Like many high performers, Jilyne’s path started with sport. As a professional ski racer, she knew how to train hard, push her limits, and chase ambitious goals. From the outside, she looked confident. But on the inside? She wrestled with the same self-doubt so many athletes (and humans) do.
What really struck her, though, was how universal those feelings were. It wasn’t just her. Everywhere she looked, she saw young women struggling with the same quiet voice that says, you’re not enough.
That realization sparked an idea: What if we gave girls the tools to face those doubts earlier? What if we could catch them before the fear of not being good enough calcified into adulthood?
And so, ZGiRLS was born.
The early days weren’t easy. There were pilot programs, endless trial and error, and one unforgettable moment when Jilyne and her co-founder entered a business plan competition. They didn’t win first place, but one of the judges was so moved by their vision that he wrote them a $50,000 check on the spot! That money launched ZGiRLS into motion, led to partnerships with athletes like Lindsey Vonn, and validated what Jilyne already knew: this work mattered.
Of course, the road wasn’t all smooth. At one point, their equipment, worth nearly $10,000, was stolen out of a car. For a small nonprofit, it was a devastating blow. Jilyne admits there were moments when she thought about walking away. But with support from her mom, her friends, and her growing community, she turned that setback into fuel, using it to rally support and inspire a new wave of fundraising.
Eleven years later, ZGiRLS continues to grow. And Jilyne continues to evolve as a leader, navigating the same tensions all of us do: dreaming big while staying grounded, letting go of old habits, and learning how to show up in new ways.
The Universal Struggle: Self-Doubt
One of the most refreshing things about Jilyne is how openly she talks about self-doubt. For a long time, she thought it was something she had to hide. Now she knows: it’s universal.
We talked about how even the most accomplished people wrestle with that inner critic. Perfectionism, imposter syndrome, the feeling that nothing is ever “enough”, those patterns don’t disappear with success. If anything, they can intensify.
But here’s the flip side: recognizing that self-doubt is universal can be freeing. It’s not a personal flaw, it’s part of being human. And once you stop trying to eliminate it, you can start asking a better question: How do I relate to this voice differently?
That’s where tools like mattering, character strengths, and savoring (which we’ve explored in other episodes) come into play. But it’s also where the next section comes in: the power of people.
Why Support Systems Matter
When Jilyne talks about the low points of her journey, the stolen equipment, the endless fundraising asks, the moments of burnout, one theme always comes up: she didn’t get through it alone.
Support systems aren’t just nice to have. They’re essential.
For Jilyne, it was her mom reminding her of the bigger picture, her co-founders pushing her to take bigger swings, and her team holding her accountable when she wanted to shrink back into comfort.
This is something I see in high-performing organizations all the time. The ones that succeed don’t just have one strong leader, they have a culture of support, accountability, and shared vision.
For individuals, it’s the same. If you’re trying to grow on your own, you’re setting yourself up for unnecessary struggle. Surround yourself with people who will challenge you, encourage you, and remind you of who you are when you forget.
One of the most poignant parts of our conversation was when Jilyne admitted that her biggest challenge wasn’t doing more, it was doing less.
She had to let go of the belief that working longer hours was the only way forward. She had to learn to show up differently, to focus on intention instead of sheer effort, to prioritize energy management, and to step away from the “hustle harder” narrative that so many of us get trapped in.
This isn’t just about work-life balance. It’s about transformation. You can’t grow into a new version of yourself if you’re still clinging to the old patterns. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is to release the habits that once served you but no longer fit.
3 Actionable Steps You Can Take
So what can you learn from Jilyne’s journey and apply to your own life? Here are three actionable steps:
1. Balance Big Dreams with Small Steps
Ambition is great. But without breaking it down, ambition can quickly turn into overwhelm.
Write down your big vision. Then ask: What’s the next smallest step I can take toward this?
Celebrate the small wins. They’re not just milestones, they’re fuel.
Remember: no one builds a nonprofit, a business, or a championship career overnight. It’s baby steps all the way.
2. Build Your Support System
Self-doubt thrives in isolation. Growth thrives in community.
Identify 3 people you can lean on when you hit resistance.
Be intentional about surrounding yourself with people who challenge and encourage you.
When you hit a setback, don’t retreat, reach out. That’s where resilience is built.
3. Practice Self-Compassion in the Process
Transformation isn’t linear. There will be setbacks, resistance, and days when you want to quit.
When you notice the inner critic, pause. Instead of fighting it, ask: What would I say to a friend in this situation?
Replace the “do more” mentality with a focus on doing what matters most.
Give yourself permission to grow slowly. Patience and compassion are what make progress sustainable.
Bringing It Home
My conversation with Jilyne was a powerful reminder that the journey of growth isn’t about perfection, it’s about persistence. It’s about surrounding yourself with the right people, breaking big dreams into small steps, and practicing compassion along the way.
ZGiRLS is changing the lives of middle school girls every day by giving them tools to face self-doubt early. But the lessons extend far beyond adolescence. Whether you’re chasing a new goal, leading a team, or simply trying to show up better in your daily life, the principles are the same.
Big dreams. Small steps. Strong support. And compassion through it all.
If you take nothing else from this episode, take this: you don’t have to wait until you feel ready. Start where you are. Take the next step. And trust that the process itself will shape you into the person you need to become.
Your Turn:
Which of these three steps resonates most with you right now? Are you in a season where you need to focus on breaking down big goals, strengthening your support system, or practicing more self-compassion?
I’d love to hear from you. Shoot me a note, share this with a friend, or better yet, start putting these steps into practice today.
p.s., if you were moved by Jilyne and her mission, you can donate to ZGiRLS here!
Recent Episodes
